This is the meeting temple (where M. had met Thakur) ­ the temple of Sri Ramakrishna. M. is standing below in the circular veranda to the south. What is he thinking of? After a while, he offers pranam by touching the steps. M. is silent and serene. Perhaps a flood of happy memories is surging in the temple of his mind. How many divine words, how many divine sights have taken shape in it!

In this very room, Thakur had imparted instructions to M. on his second visit: "Knowing one God is jnana and not knowing Him is ignorance. You must serve all members of your family but in your heart you should know that they are not yours, nor are you theirs, that God alone is yours as well as theirs. The mind is like milk and the world like water. Milk is mixed with water. If you curdle the milk in a corner and then take butter out of it by churning, then no harm can come to it when kept in the water of world. The butter will just float on the water. In other words, you must practice tapasya, keep company of sadhus and gain devotion and then live in the world. Then this perishable world will do you no harm." Thakur had said, "It will be enough if you just visit here (him). I saw you in Chaitanya’s community singing party. You are my own, like father and son ­ of the same origin." When M. insisted that he should be initiated into sannyasa, Thakur said, "The Mother of the Universe has told me that She would keep you within household for Her work. You will have to read out the Bhagavata to people." (Joining his little finger with his thumb) Thakur said that M. would have to do just that much work. M. talked to a devotee in Puri about ‘just that much’ work ­ the Mother’s work is being done for the last fifty years constantly but even now he has not been freed from it.

Thakur had said, "Mother, when You keep him in household, pray, grant him Your darshan at times." Hundreds and thousands of the nectar like words of his five years with Thakur are swelling in his mind. So, it is that M. is so solemn and serene. Shivram Dada, Thakur’s younger nephew breaks his silence. As soon as he sees M., he welcomes him saying, "Come in brother, come in." M. lies down on the floor between the two cots.

Thakur has established M. in the unmana samadhi in a few days. Once or twice he asked M. whether he had understood (the nature of) the unmana samadhi. Those who are busy with worldly matters can have easy access to this samadhi. They can absorb their mind in God even amidst work. The Purana too makes a mention of this type of samadhi in the lives of divine personalities like Brahma busy with other work. Brahma imparted Brahmajnana to Sanaka and others in the disguise of a swan ­ but he could not do so while he was in his usual body, engaged in work. Just as the jiva unites with the Eternal in deep sleep and then returns to his normal state after getting rid of tiredness, similarly the eligible persons unite with God while awake, busy doing work. And then, having dispelled the defilement of work, go forward on the path of the Reality. Thus, all acts of the spiritually great conform to the truth.

Now, M. rises and goes round seeing the pictures of gods and goddesses and devotees of Thakur’s time. M. now stands at the north-eastern corner of the smaller cot. He cannot recognise one of the pictures. So, he asks, "Whose picture is it?" Shivram Dada and others answer together, "It is that of Mathur Babu." There are many pictures in this room. M. keeps on looking at the picture of the drowning Peter and then says, "There was a picture of Vak Devi here (near Thakur’s bed on the western wall) in Thakur’s time. Before talking to any newcomer, Thakur used to look at this picture and say, ‘Mother, I am a fool. Please talk for me seated in my throat.’ "

The northern door of Thakur’s room is open. One can see the Nahabat from here. A hefty sadhu from western India is seated on the first storey of the Nahabat. His head is shaven and he has a white cloak on his body. M. goes to the northern veranda to have a look at the sadhu. He stands and has his darshan. In the meanwhile, a number of devotees come from outside and offer pranam to M. They know M. as the immortal recorder of the Kathamrita and a close disciple of Thakur.

Shivram Dada makes an offering of sweets brought by Dr. Bakshi to Thakur. This prasad will be consumed later on. M. climbs down to the courtyard of Kali’s temple to have the darshan of the rest of the deities. He goes out of the south-eastern door under the second arch. To his right are the six temples of Shiva. He offers pranam lying on the third step, two and a half arm length away from the northern part towards south. M. says, "Here Thakur often used to sit. It was here that Thakur was photographed while absorbed in samadhi. This photograph is worshipped everywhere. Thakur himself worshipped this photograph and declared that it would be worshipped later on everywhere. This photograph is of a very high state. His mind had dissolved itself in the infinite, in the sea of Satchidananda. In this state, the world becomes an illusion and Brahman the reality."

M. comes toward the east, goes across the courtyard and prostrates himself facing north at the steps of the Radhakanta temples down in the courtyard. He says, "Thakur used to offer pranam in this way when he was accompanied by Keshab. You see, the Brahmos do not worship idols so it was to train them that Thakur did it." M. does likewise also to train the devotees.

Now he climbs up the veranda of the temple. Putting his cloth round his neck, M. joined his hands and offers pranam to Radhakanta while lying on the ground, and taking some charanamrita (sacramental water) puts it in his mouth. And standing near the drum of Ganga water to the south, he asks Antevasi in a whisper, "Do you have some money? Please give me a rupee." Gadadhar goes out to bring small coins for that rupee.

Shivram Dada gives some Tulasi leaves as prasad in M.’s hand. Climbing down the stairs, M. again offers his pranam prostrating himself facing north along with bhaktas. M. says again, "Though Thakur had such a delicate body, what does God not do for the instruction of devotees when he comes as an avatara?. Christ gave up his body on a cross. Thakur took upon himself the sins of his bhaktas and redeemed them, himself suffering the excruciating pain of cancer. Man can never repay the debt he owes to the Lord. Who can understand why He created the universe and the creatures, why He plays this game with Vidya Maya and Avidya Maya and why does He redeem the bhaktas by taking upon Himself all their sins? It is an amazing riddle, even the rishis could not understand it. So they said: lokavattu lilakaivalyam (this world is His play)."

Now M. salutes at the foot of the steps of the courtyard in front of the Mother Kali’s temple. First the door-keeper, then the beshkari (he who decorates the idols) see M. and offer him pranam. They are followed by Nakul, Ramalal Dada’s son and Thakur’s nephew, the priest of the Mother, who comes and welcomes M. saying, "Do come, elder uncle".

M. with his cloth round his neck and the Mother to his right offers pranams by lying on the ground in the veranda as he faces west. Then he rises and gets absorbed within facing east. Behind M. are the Younger Ramesh and the Doctor. And in front of him is Antevasi to the west. To his right are Vinay and Buddhiram. It is 4.15 p.m.

The temple attendants opened the western door. A net of the rays of the setting sun enters the room lighting up the Mother’s exceedingly beautiful face. The Mother scintillates with joy. The doorkeeper takes M. to the western veranda. Here M. has the darshan of the Mother concentrating his mind on Her. The Mother has a smiling face, lighted up with joy as one sees Her with western and southern doors open. M. remains absorbed in Her darshan for long. Vinay and Antevasi then offer pranams to M. stealthily without his knowledge. They know that he does not let anybody touch his feet while saluting him.

What does M. see, what is he contemplating upon as he stands so absorbed? Perhaps he is contemplating the form of the Mother he had been shown by the grace of Thakur. Thakur said to him, "The Mother is not a clay idol but the smiling manifestation of divinity. The Mother Herself accepts the devotions of the bhaktas in this form of clay." Besides, she played with Thakur in Her divine form, talked to him, ate from his hands. And it was this Mother whom he fed with luchi of bhog when he saw Her as a cat. It is this Mother who showed to him, in the form of Rati’s mother, that occult powers are like a prostitute’s stool. It was again in front of this Mother that Thakur sang the song: ‘O, Bhavatarini, the Redeemer, the destroyer of our fear...’ and dedicated M. to Her. It was to this Mother that Thakur sent Narendra to pray for food and clothes for his mother and brothers. But Narendra asked for discrimination and dispassion, knowledge and devotion. It was this Mother that Thakur saw with dishevelled hair, with little bells tinkling from Her ankles climbing down from the temple above, absorbed in Her joyful play of dance. M.’s mind is immersed in hundreds of these reminiscences. He is overwhelmed with bhava.

Going down, M. stands on the courtyard below in front of the temple, and has darshan of the Mother, while he faces north. Thakur one day sat in the south of the courtyard, almost next to the Nata Mandir with M. to his left and dedicated M. to the Mother singing the following song ­ ‘O, Bhavatarini, the Redeemer, the destroyer of our fear, I call upon you name. I cast my burden on You. Save me, save me, O, Mother if You will.’

M. in the Nat Mandir. M. goes towards the south taking the middle path. The Mother is behind M. M. embraces the first pillar of the second row to the right. One day Thakur having embraced this very pillar shed tears overwhelmed by emotion. Bhagavata-guna-prakshak, the musical drama was being played here. M. reaches the sacrificial block direct from the middle spot. One day Thakur was moving about like a lion on this very path after the evening arati. M. again climbs the upper courtyard in front of the Mother’s temple facing north. Nakul comes and gives some charanamrita in M.’s hands. He marks on his forehead a tilak (religious sign) with vermilion and gives him some sandesh which had been offered to the Mother. Yogin, the treasurer of the temple also comes to this spot and offers pranam to M. Prostrating himself again before the Mother, M. comes down to the lower courtyard.

M. is now in the Chandani. A beggar begs of him. M. says to Antevasi, "Please lend me four paise." There is tide over the Ganga now. M. comes to ghat and sits down there, towards the northern portion of the steps, three arm lengths away towards the south. He touches the Ganga and performs japa. After sometime, he offers salutations lying on the grounds and climbs up. Seeing a sadhu from the United Provinces of India, he salutes him and exchanges a few sweet words.

M. comes out of the northern courtyard walking through the Chandani. Just then attorney Viren Bose meets him and offers him pranam.

M. is again in Thakur’s room. He again offers pranam in the middle of the smaller cot facing west. It was here that Thakur’s footmat used to lie. In winter, M. used to sit on this mat when asked by Thakur. One day, M. was seated on this mat. It was eight at night. There was nobody in the room. Thakur was absorbed in bhava samadhi and had not yet regained the normal state. From outside it appeared that he was intoxicated. He said to M. in an indistinct voice, "Let nobody think that the Mother’s work will remain incomplete. The Mother can create big teachers with a piece of straw."

M. was insisting upon Thakur to grant him sannyasa. Thakur and the Mother of the Universe however willed that he should stay in his household and impart instruction from there, and read out the Bhagavata to human beings scalded with sansara. Seeing Rakhal, Yogen, Tarak, all of whom had married and were yet destined to be sannyasis by Thakur’s blessings, M. was yearning to embrace sannyasa like his brother disciples though he also had a wife. The Mother of the Universe however willed that M. should remain in the household for training others. So, it was that Thakur talked to him so harshly with displeasure.

After this incident, M. completely gave himself up to Thakur’s will. Thakur always used to say that the sansara was burning fire. It was after being scalded by this fire that M. first came to Thakur. From his early age, M. had come to know of this matter. It was to save himself forever from this fire that M. had been imploring Thakur for sannyasa.

It was while sitting in this room that Thakur asked M. to remain in the household to do the work of God. And it was while sitting in this room that Thakur again prayed to the Mother for M.’s sake. He prayed, "Mother, if You wish to keep him in the household, please grant him Your darshan from time to time. Otherwise, while staying in the cauldron of fire, how will he be able to do Your work?" All this happened in the early days of M. Now he is old. It is but natural that these divine, sweet memories should rise in his mind.

As M. is rising after offering his farewell salutations, Dr. Vipin enters the room through the northern door. The Doctor had seen Thakur and has enjoyed his love. They exchange happy memories of Thakur. Now M. is to leave for Calcutta. Going down to the western veranda from the northern veranda he finds that his slippers have vanished. He says, "I see that my shoes have disappeared." The devotees can’t retrieve them though they search a great deal. A particular bhakta says to himself, "This has happened because of my fault. I should have picked them up and put them in the car. We are selfish, busy seeking pleasure but we do not care to see whether we are serving him who is giving us this pleasure." M. begins to walk barefoot. His body and his two feet are very delicate. M. has to undergo this discomfort because of the carelessness of the bhaktas, and the bhaktas feel mentally very uncomfortable. The bhakta begins to repent.

It is already dark. M. gets into the Doctor’s car in front of the Kuthi. The Doctor, Jagabandhu and Vinay are with him. Viren Bose’s car also moves along with his. The car reaches close to the Baranagore Bazar after passing through Alam Bazaar. M. says, "It is an anachronism that I am alive. I feel this when I see new faces and other minds." M. is now seventy. The car passes in front of the Cossipore Garden. Pointing at a dilapidated house to his right, M. says, "It seems, it is the same house. Yes, it is just like it." The Doctor has his house in Cossipore. Vinay and the Doctor stay back here along with the car. M. leaves by Viren Bose’s car. Jagabandhu is with him. This car reaches Morton School in Amherst Street near the Circular Road.

It’s about 8 p.m. The devotees are awaiting M. in the staircase room on the fourth level ­ Balai, Ramani, the Younger Nalini, Fakir with a companion are there. Also, the older bhaktas of the Math, Pulin Mitra and his son-in-law Ranada. They all came before it was evening. M. is very tired. Though M. sits with the bhaktas, only his body is here but his mind is in Thakur, in Cossipore Garden and in the Dakshineswar Temple ­ in Sri Ramakrishna, the solace of one’s life breath.